Whoops, it was a problem with my theme, it’s fixed now—thanks for letting me know! and thanks for following of course :)
A word of advice to my fellow big-haired ladies:
Don’t move to a humid place. Ever
I love this.
Giving a speech at the College Scholarship Celebration tomorrow about how my Odyssey aid helps me honor my family in Mexico/work for US-Mexico peace.
What the audience is expecting:
What they’re getting:
Sorry guys.
What a fabulous day we had today.
Totally worth staying up super late to finish the paper I procrastinated by going to the lake and the museum.
Hey Ladies: About the “Sandwich” Jokes
Listen, it’s normal to be annoyed at woman-in-the-kitchen jokes. All that stuff you’re saying about privilege and misogynistic environments is true, and you absolutely have the right call it out and let it be known that you don’t find it funny. That’s your right, and sometimes, it’s honestly necessary.
But I’m going to talk for five seconds about just what happens when you flip out and get yourself all worked up. Yes, people can be shitty, and yes, it’s pretty unimpressive when people think racist or sexist jokes make them edgy and fresh,but do you know what you’re doing when you allow people to troll you to such an extent? When you show such vulnerability and emotional susceptibility to a joke that was designed to offend you? You’re showing men, and other women, that all it takes are some words to make you question your security. You’re emphasizing the difference between you and those in power, and you’re revealing a naive belief that policing words is the same as changing perceptions. If your goal is to create a world where women get more respect and aren’t considered a different species, do it by being a woman that commands respect. Not by sitting there begging some offensive idiots to give you respect and throwing a tantrum when they don’t.
Yes, it sucks to be on the short end of the stick when it comes to privilege. It can be even more frustrating when people act like that privilege doesn’t exist. If you want, you can sit around on Tumblr with the other feminists so they can tell you how right you are and how shitty everyone is and I won’t judge you for a second. There’s some badass, hilarious, incredibly smart women in the world who do just that.
But you could also suck it up, even though you shouldn’t have to, and take some ownership of yourself and the way people interact with you. You could build friendships that aren’t exclusively with people who agree with you. You could stop wasting time acting exactly like people who make sexist jokes want you to act, and you could start making it known that words are words—no matter what people say, you’re still in their schools, their power structures, their communities, as a human who is their equal and their ally and who happens to be female. Not an insecure enemy that can be worked into a fit over some hostile language.
Own up. Be accountable. Be a competent, respect-commanding, cross-cultural, female human being. Stop being threatened by men, and even more importantly, stop being threatened by other women. I know enough smart ladies and gentlemen to know that sex has nothing to do with being a jackass, so destroy these notions that any one group is the bad guy. Encourage women not to undermine themselves, and please, don’t write off or alienate all the men that are so much smarter, more reasonable, and respectful than the media gives them credit for—I promise you they may even be the majority. Stop giving jokes power, because at the end of the day, only actions matter.
